New World Orbit Crew Settles GIF Pronunciation Debate With Ingenious Compromise
You’re aware of the divide. Some people pronounce the acronym “GIF” with a soft G, as in “gerbil” or “gelatinous,” (more…)
Abstract Left Decides It’s About Time The Hells Angels Join The 21st Century
Uh oh. Trouble's abrewin' down in Equality Town. We have it on good information, a certain influential SJW (more…)
“Life Saving Hacks For Your Car” By People Who Have Never Seen A Car
It doesn’t matter how we got there. We followed a clickbait link from a very low intellect “news” website, (more…)
Name Of The Next Huge One-Name Platinum Culture Hero Revealed!
Of course you're used to one-name stars. Madonna, Drake, Bono, Common. Some of the people, it's a given name, (more…)
Nope, Nothin’ Wrong With This Guy, Seems Completely Normal, What’s The Problem?
This guy's photo was published by Fox 16 in some GOD forsaken place--holy shit, it was at the Arkansas Crater of Diamonds State Park. (more…)
Shocking: Naïve Asian Women Duped Into Sucking On Small Vibrating Appliances
WAT??? That headline makes no fucking sense. And mind you, we wrote it. We don't know what the (more…)
Comedy Gold Narrowly Averted On Commercial Airline Flight
What's the stupidest thing you can think of to smuggle? Try to think of it from the perspective of a person of low intelligence, (more…)
Mr. Beast’s Public Oral Fixation Is Ruining The Internet (With Graphs)
Who is Mr. Beast? We don't know and we don't want to know. All the energy we expend on this post will be focused on (more…)
We Are Forced By Covidstances To Provide Terrible Customer Support
Any company, governmental, or institutional office you call these days you get the same rambling, self-serving (more…)
Breaking Planetary News: The Gutenberg Rolodex Has Been Found
It’s now been confirmed the actual all-original first edition copy of Gutenberg’s Rolodex has been discovered (more…)