Sinister hipster teacher busted.Dispatch From OrbitIt’s almost like they screw up purposely, like they must have wanted to get busted. Doesn’t matter which method of screwing up they choose, it almost always results in jail, firing, or both. You have to wonder how they thought they were going to escape detection. Or who knows, maybe lots of teachers are doing the exact same kinds of things and just haven’t been caught.

We can’t know either way. Look at the photo there. Kind of a sinister looking hipster. What did this high school teacher do to trip himself up? He was walking around downtown Orlando with an open beer. That’s just begging for police attention. He attracted it. When the cops searched him, he had a joint in his pocket, “a vape pen with suspected hash oil inside and a small plastic baggie with a powdery substance, which tested positive for methamphetamine…”

He was charged with possession of all of the above and he’s out on bail. From the story I read on ClickOrlando dot com, I get the impression all the drugs were for his personal use; doesn’t sound like he was selling the stuff. At the same time, you have to wonder what he was doing wandering around with all that shit. Drugs for any occasion? He’s out on bail, but he’d have been better off to limit the number of illegal substances on his person. Oh, and dump the lager.

Hmm. Kind of like sewing the seeds of your own destruction.

Teacher caught banging student.This next high school teacher, who doesn’t look anywhere near as hip as the first guy, was carrying on with a 17 year old female student. She told police the guy’s in love with her and told her if he got caught, she was worth it. Hmm. Kind of like sewing the seeds of your own destruction. The guy is 31. He should have known better. He especially should have known better than to get involved with a nitwit. The way they got caught is she “accidentally” uploaded photos of them to social media.

And, in still another means to a dead end, a 48 year old female middle school teacher was out on bail with assault charges. We’re not even going to use her photo; it’s too pathetic. A 13 year old boy asked to go to the restroom. She followed him into the hall where she knocked him to the floor and then shoved him up against the wall, pinning him there.

Somebody in this story had an attitude problem. Could be either or both.

“The student’s mother told News 6 that her son tried to break free, but couldn’t escape the teacher’s hold.” The teacher was already under scrutiny for having grabbed the kid’s arm a month earlier. Wow. Somebody in this story had an attitude problem. Could be either or both. We’ll never know.

Things being the way they are, you know there’s surveillance video of the incident. You think I could find it online? NO. It’s a travesty they’re keeping that video back from us. The public has a right to KNOW, dammit. And to be entertained in the bargain.

Since I couldn’t find the actual video, I turned up a 21 second video of some random teacher disciplining a student. The quality is poor, but the punchline is legendary.

M. Nick